"Ryan Donovan. Where the hell have you been?"
"Hey V."
"Like that. Just Hey V. Disappeared off the face. In the wind. 10 days. Just Gone. Not a word. Not a peep. Not a sound".
"Hmmm. I was at a retreat Veronica".
"A retreat? Up in Flag?"
"No".
"Damn you Ryan. Always the arrogant little prick. Your way. Your path. Like it or not".
"Veronica. Please. It's over 110 degrees. I'm doing my very best to just chill. My Momz been dead 8 years now. Cut me slack. Pleeze".
"Ryan I just care so much for you. This has been protocol since we met on Santa Monica Beech at 13 years old. As well I read your blog yesterday regarding TBGNS. I'm so happy for you. You need someone to love and care for you".
"Yeah.
Right.
Newz Flash.
She ain't the one.
As Usual.
Went by her crib as she had requested.
Knock on the door.
Then she all up in da mood dickety moody mood crap.
All I heard was I am busy, come back....
She still yakking.
I'm walking.
As in See Ya Bye.
Damn sure ain't got no time for da bitch.
"Oh Ryan. Poor Thang. You and women".
"Exactly.
Treacherous as can be.
Honestly.
I don't give two shitz or three fast flying fuckz one way or the other regarding all women.
Celibate nine years and counting. For life.
Hence forth regarding my life there is absolutely no past what so ever, except you.
Every day is a day advanced down the positive side freeway.
Ya ain't today. Ya ain't here.
Straight up".
"So, where you staying. Are you going to remain in Tucson? Where did you disappear to? Are you alright?
"V.
I don't know.
Pleeze.
I appreciate your concern.
I'm good. Just don't start with all the questions".
"I just love you Ryan. For seemingly a lifetime".
"It has been a lifetime V.
You My Dawg. You My Homey. Ya just Female".
"I know. I just worry about you".
"I appreciate that V.
Honestly.
Every night in my turbo toss and turn sleep.
I make a decision to sign onto this blog sight the next day.
Then sign off.
'Ryan Sean Donovan'
1948 - 2014 .
Then just like the Dark Brew Coffee and Menthol Top Rollies I'm at the college dropping a peck.
Just another fuckin addiction. That's all this is"
"Ryan. Your just lost in a writers cramp. You don't talk about politics. World affairs. I believe you miss that subject matter".
"Nothing could be on the farthest.
I would prefer Napalm Cornea Injections with a Rectal Exam Float than to even ponder writing about this just about gone world and the treacherous conditions of things.
I've stated, wrote and screamed all I have to say.
Honestly.
Regarding this world. This planet.
I do not give 4 shitz and 13 fast flyin fuckz.
I have spent 90% of my life doing what I could never have imagined doing in my wildest dreams.
90% of my life doing what I never ever wanted to do.
This is my 10%.
Anything remotely connected to the past is not even a nano of a thought. Except, again, of course you.
As well this blog is the past.
It was my outlet.
My therapy.
My joy.
Now it is the Hell Bound Strings of Deathly Addiction".
"Phew.
Ryan.
You ain't playin. What are you going to do?"
"Don't know V.
What I do know is that in the Hebrew language there is no word for Retire.
As well no word for Borrow.
That said.
I'm gonna get a real job.
God has blessed me in so many ways.
One is my health and the ability to just keep going. So there Ya have it".
"That's it?"
"That's it's".
"Just like that?"
"Just like that"
Ryan. Out.
2014/03/04 at 02:03
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2014/06/06 at 22:37